Want to know what ADHD feels like when you need to make decisions?
My Brain is nonstop. It goes to every million possibilities of what ifs, options, and scenarios and then no 1 option fits all, so which do you choose or prioritise? ADHD is having too much info and awareness, so you end up paralysed. Then doing nothing has consequences, so whoosh, you go around in circles again.
Add in the big, quick emotions of ADHD, add them to every possibility, every what if, every option and every scenario because that's what my brain does of its own accord; it's not a choice. It is Automatic. It is my Default.
Can you understand now? Can you understand why we look confused and why decision-making is hard? Can you understand that we are not being awkward when we don't reach a decision? We just can't.
As a side note, this can all look like Anxiety. It isn't. I'm not necessarily worrying or anxious. It is stressful, but it is not Anxiety. Unless you understand the inside of my Brain, you'd not know the difference.
When you add impulsivity to this headf*ck, it gets more chaotic. Impulsivity can be a quick Buzz but can also be an escape/end to the Decision-Making hell.
Sometimes, my quick, full Brain and flash impulsivity can be an amazing, fruitful thing.
Sometimes, for some, it ends in problematic decisions and consequences.
This is my permanent Brain process. I cannot train my brain not to be like this. I am ADHD, and my wiring is fixed.
But breaks, a bit of respite, a bit of management, is good.
To move my Brain to Calm takes extra effort, energy, and spoons. This requires us to be reflective and 'in the moment'. Have I mentioned Time Blindness yet? My Brain again does not automatically stay in the moment as it's firing all over the place. It doesn't easily go forward, so planning is sometimes a struggle.
I can try, though. To attempt to create structures and scaffolding to carry/support this fast-speed Brain for relief and balance. For that Calm. Figuring out what helps takes investigation and attempts.
Ironically, the first line of ADHD meds is Speed. Speed joins up our Brain wiring so that it is smoother and can Calm. Funny huh?
I need multi-stimulation calming strategies. Yes, I need 2 or 3 distractions at the same time for calmness. My fave is the Sea and waves. Or birds tweeting and watching the Sea glimmer. Double stimulus. Double calm, Rhythmic sound AND visual. Not too big, but just right. Two of.
Phones are a nightmare for me. It is too much Glorious stimulation. The buzz-buzz pull of exciting messages, data, and learning feeds the hyperactivity. Yet I love it. My Brain is getting its fix, but it's not calming. Too much is too much.
So. Get the balance.
Accept the Brain science.
Know your 'happy' fix of calm.
Catch yourself when the Buzz is too big (that is really hard).
And know that when our Environment works with us when the environment needs our fast-wired attention, we are the Brains that work the best. We are the ones shining and efficient.
❤🧡💛💚💙💜
Pic of me at the beach, enjoying the calm shimmer and sparkle, listening to birds and gazing upon boats in the distance. Even if not for long. Little bursts of Calm are more my Thing. #ADHD
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