Resilience is the ability to manage and recover when things are tough or go wrong. It's like building muscles. Rupture and repair. It is the ability to repair when we have ruptured.
Resilience is good problem-solving skills.
Simple yes? No.
Recovery might include simply asking another for help or connection. Simple yet not. So many do not ask for help. Why?
Some people have shame. Shame is isolating.
Some could not share the 'issue' with another, because they have been invalidated before. So they stay stuck. Some cannot take down a defence to show vulnerability because they are holding it together and are not yet safe to reach out. Asking for help takes energy, planning and time to reach out.
Yet society has humans running a rat race.
There is a view that our children and youth are snowflakes. Too soft. But our children and youth should not need resilience because they should instead be protected and allowed to grow, shine, and develop.
They should learn within the parameters of safety. You build security, safety, and comfort first.
Our youth are pressurised, tested, forced on an education treadmill and denied fun, creativity and sport. Our Youth are watched, checked and scrutinised.
Society judges parents too. Relentlessly. There is pressure on them to be positive, to work, to support education. It is easy and lazy to point at arents and young people and blame.
Instead, we need to help each other and listen, and have a growth mindset. Be vulnerable enough to love each other and find solutions as a community.
The problem is our environment. Establishments, surroundings and isolation. Isolation is haunting us, creating a technical world relying on gadgets and box-shaped classes.
We need to learn to build inclusive communities, networks and support.
We need difference.
We are not all meant to be the same. Our World and life need differences and are dependent on them.
If we had an Inclusive world we would see less trauma and distress, and not need this thing called Resilience.
Picture of grey pebbles on a beach, on top of each other, balancing. The Beach is Millook in Cornwall, UK.
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