Originally posted September 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page I just read a comment on another page, asking what people do when heading to Burnout. This was my answer. Physical rest so a duvet day. I contract with clients from the outset that I have random Duvet Days (I'm a Counsellor). This forewarning means I have less guilt, and less guilt tends to speed up recovery. This also allows Clients to choose not to work with me from the outset if my needs do

Originally posted 2021 This post is about 'why' you need to understand us. Our health and wellbeing is balancing on how you understand us. (More info about Masking on other posts). It is so very hard to describe our NeuroDivergence. Many peers write so well but I genuinely do not think our brain is easy to understand if not experienced. First of all, we have a spikey profile. It changes. This confuses people. Sometimes we mask, sometimes we are burnt out, and sometimes we are

Originally posted December 2021 Who do you think is ADHD? Think you can spot one? I have met new ADHD friends who have Psychology degrees, some are Social Workers, Nurses, Teachers, Life Coaches and Counsellors. Even my assessing ADHD Dr is ADHD . And of course I myself am ADHD. Responses have been mixed, ranging from: 'no, I'd never have believed it', 'oh everyone is a bit like that, I do that sometimes'. Of course, my foibles are more than sometimes and I can't switch out o

Originally posted 2021 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. Today I am tired. A stressful email late last night. Not a good choice. I read it and should have 'known' to delay reading until this morning. Timing is often compromised, my impulsivity bouncing out. I then hyper-focussed on it, replying eloquently and passionately. That isn't the Awesome bit. Or rather, there is another Awesome bit. Wired up, I struggled to sleep peacefully. I was so tired but my brain bu

Originally posted 13th September 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. None of us ever know what is needed to support Wellbeing and to thrive. None of us. No one. That may sound a bit depressing coming from me, a Counsellor. Bear with me as I explain. It is literally all guesswork and trial and error. Informed guesswork. But still guesswork. That may also sound terrifying but I would not trust anyone who declared they had the answer. No one has the answer. Every

Originally posted 24th September 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. I'm going to say something weird and I damn hope people resonate and I'm not left out here on my own. In fact those last words say it all. Left out here on my own. During my 53 years of living I've noticed I'm absolutely sh#te at being on my own. On my own with no choice. Being on my own to rest is cool. Needed even. Being on my own is cool when someone is around nearby but even then, I need

Originally posted 11th October 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. I think I have Trauma responses about money. I grew up fairly poor but not neglected. Financial security is a big need of mine. Yet I also hate money. Or rather I hate the power divide where money is concerned. The inequality. It is why I offer concession spaces and also why I plan to offer a higher fee for those that can offset the concessions. I earn a lot less than people expect me to earn (

Originally posted 19th October 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. Hard to tell how I am feeling, often. Or if I'm physically well, or not. It's an Autistic Thing, for some. To help me know if I'm ok, please alert me (kindly) when you notice (more than normal) that: 1. I'm a bit grumpy. 2. I'm a bit blank. 3. I've not been laughing. 4. I seem extra tired. 5. I tell you my vision is blurred. 6. I can't be ar#sed (more than normal) to cook. 7. I can't be ars#d t

Originally posted 23rd November 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. Now. I'm not domesticated and I'm not that demanding but ffs. The mental load as a woman/primary carer/wife is pretty darn huge. I'm not intentionally being gender based so I'm writing this from my own perspective and I'm ok to be challenged. Just sent this to an understanding friend. Btw I'm ill today, off work (self employed, no sick pay for me). " Moan alert. Because I'm ill I've done f#ck

Originally posted 4th December 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. I process everything a bit delayed. I process how my body feels physically. Delayed. I process loved ones emotions. Delayed. I process my own emotions. Delayed. I process body pain. Delayed. It's like a slap in the face. A surprise. I'm Autistic. I don't like Surprises. Every single time this delay happens and every single time it is a surprise. Even though this happens and should not be a sur

Originally posted 6th December 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. As I was called in, I realised it was a Nurse I do not like. For context, I have Disordered Eating. I manage this by doing lots of work on body image, by familiarising myself with my body, becoming friends with my body and trying to eat Intuitively. I do not diet. If I restrict foods I will topple into a negative relationship with food and my body. I assign to health at every size. I have done

Originally posted 18th December 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. I have 4 big commitments on the horizon. Amazing, exciting stuff, and I'm paralysed. I need to write up a training proposal for a Local Counselling Establishment. I have a million amazing ideas floating inside my head, it'll be awesome. I've been asked to write a creative entry into a book, an intervention I want to share. I have training I want to deliver myself, on line. A webinar about why

Originally posted 21st December 2023 on my NeuroDiversity University Facebook page. I genuinely believe it is the Autistic and Adhd Folk, all the divergents, who are wired to care for each other, and fight for justice, where we can. The endless cyclical worries and woes, the big feelings and big thoughts, leave many questioning whether we do enough, whether we make a difference at all, and ponder on what our purpose is and what life is all about. It is nearing the end of Dece

Originally published 30th December 2023 on NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page I get lots of feedback in my life that I help people feel better. I need to make something clear. Every time someone feels better having been or worked with me, it's because they've seen, through me, that they are good, fab, just not shite like they thought they were. I've always had this gift, mostly, of people feeling better about Themselves when they have been around me. I'm like a Meta

Originally published 2nd January 2024 on NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page As folk are returning to work and school, that yuk fearful feeling can descend. I love my job, but being back in work mode means I have to start working against my neurotype. What do I mean? My brain does not naturally stay focussed and alert on boring (to me) stuff. People (clients) are never boring. But diary management, time management, and note taking, sorting payment, is like forcing my

Originally published 25th January 2024 on NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page I am 1 person, this is just my account. My addiction is food. I acknowledge it 'may' not be as damaging as other drugs. Anyhoodle. Someone asked about giving up a 'Thing' of choice we feel addicted to. This was my answer and I thought I'd share it here. I've written before about being triggered at the Doctors surgery about talk of weight loss. It's something I will always struggle with but

Originally published 29th January 2024 on NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page So,. I'm laughing away here. I saw 'a friends request' from someone and thought 'ah OK that's nice, I know they know 'x' so I'll accept that'. And I pressed the 'button'. Then realised it was a Friends recommendation. Not a request. I'm Adhd. I speed read. Not by choice . I realised I may look like a stalker so cancelled it and thought I'd send a message explaining why I look like a stalker

Originally published 1st February 2024 on NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page Life is sometimes so back to front. And unfair. Most of my NeuroDivergent Community are struggling with low self esteem, self doubt and Imposter Syndrome. They are also fearful. Fearful of rejection, fearful of making mistakes and so very tired. Tired of trying to find safe spaces. Too tired or scared to ask for help. Tired and wounded from being told, directly and indirectly, that they are

Originally published 3rd June 2022 on NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page I responded to a peer asking for a good Metaphor for the ADHD Brain, something that allows others to truly understand and empathise (but not pity) us. This is what I came up with. My ADHD Brain is like an Orchestra with MANY members/musicians/instruments. A non ADHDer is a Soloist. When I have a thought or emotion, the whole damn Orchestra is involved/responsive. Clanging and loudness and misal

First published on 19th August on NeuroDiversity University Blog FaceBook page Some of my sassiest writing is not considered 'formal'. But what exactly IS formal communication other than an Elitist way of following set language and order and rules. It discriminates and divides. It is Classist. So here's my FORMAL response to my Voluntary Counselling Body picking me to be Audited. We are chosen at random to be dissected. Ready? Hello Registers team. I am asking to delay my Aud